As a follow-up to my last blogpost “The Ubiquitous, Endless Loop of Suck,” I have some more thoughts about self-talk and our harsh, self-critical inner voice.
In addition to our excessive usage of the verb "suck," another term that frequently peppers our thoughts is "fucked-up" and its variations. Though this term comes with its own pitfalls, it also has its relative strengths when compared to "suck."
Future Tense
I think I'm gonna fuck up.
I think I'm gonna fuck it up.
Present Tense
Observation: I'm fucking up. (This usage may occur during any activity/event/performance)
Event/Thing/Personal Evaluation: That's fucked up.
Self-evaluation: I'm fucked-up (Inebriation).
Past tense
Observation: Oh, no, I fucked up. I fucked it up. I was fucked-up.
Evaluation: That was fucked-up.
Unlike "suck," there is no strong implication of permanence in the term "fucked-up." It suggests a softer, gentler assessment. Whatever we have done can be fixed, cnn be improved. We can certainly start over. We will eventually sober up (for example, being fuck-up too frequently in 2023 can lead to "Dry January" in 2024). Essentially, fucking up allows us to go back to the drawing board. On the other hand, however, if we suck, we fail. There is no do-over, no work around. It's in our permanent file. There is no off-the-record. It's on social media and we are now a meme.
Exceptions: I'm fucked up (mental health). (Here the implication of permanence returns).
I offer these thoughts as the second step of recovery from the tyranny of the inner harsh critic. Rather than using the word "suck," try transitioning to the slightly gentler term "fucked-up." You will be glad you did.
NOTE: No part of this blogpost was created with AI.
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